Wednesday, November 7, 2018

The Love Languages

Have you ever heard of the 5 Love Languages? I never really gave much thought about it until I now realize that it is crucial to identify your love languages when you're married, in a serious long term relationship or basically any kind of relationships. These languages of love can translate to friendships and parent/child relationships, too.

What are the 5 love languages? They are: Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, and Physical Touch. Every person has different type of love languages. According to the concept, the way you feel loved is also the way you show love.

I never really understood what my love language is. But I think unconsciously I've been doing it already. After reading about the 5 love languages now I understood why I do what I do.

I just found out that my love language is Words of Affirmation. After understanding deeper of what it means, I find it really fits me. Although I personally also strongly agree that "action speak louder than words", turns out that I need Words of Affirmation. I noticed that positive verbal gestures goes a long way for me. Words such as "I love you" or "good job" or "you look really nice" makes me feel acknowledged. I realized that I have been doing the same in return to others. I like to give positive verbal gestures to everyone. For example: I've come to the realization that more often than not I like to use words of affirmation when talking to my kids. I hope it gives them a boost of confidence by hearing those verbal gestures. The way it has the same impact with myself.

My husband on the other hand, has the love language of Quality Time. Meaning: "In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says I Love You like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful."

I tried my best to provide him with his type of love language. I think I did. I always try to be present and always be there for him. But I need something in return too. I need my words of affirmation. I hope by finding out what we each need might change our relationship for the better. Hopefully we both can grow for the better.

I want to know what your love language is (take the test here) and tell me all about it! I would love to hear about how different (or perhaps the same) love languages between you and your partner plays a big role in your relationship.

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